Here to Eternity

Yesterday I was thinking about how excited we were as spirit children to come to this earth. To receive for the first time our physical bodies and to be able to prove ourselves to our Heavenly Father. So excited that Christ was willing to step forward and offer up such an amazing sacrifice to assure that we would all be able to return to our heavenly home. So excited that we fought over the choice of how we should go about it; others wanting so much to assure their return that they were willing to lose their place there forever by not excepting the decision of free agency.



Perhaps those of us here understood that the time away from our spiritual home would be but a moment in relationship to time as we knew it and had courage that we would make correct choices and return on our own, with the knowledge that Christ would make up for our shortcomings.



As always I was thinking about all of this in connection with Taylor. When someone leaves this life prematurely (according to our time table) people are quick to say that they are in a better place, that we don't have to worry about them, they are happier than we can imagine, that being in a place so beautiful they would never want to leave.


But we did want to leave. We wanted to come here. We wanted our bodies and the experiences that this life offered.



As difficult as life has at times been there have also been times of great joy and happiness, many of those because of my children. I wanted Taylor to experience that same joy. I wanted to see him grow into a young man. I wanted him to experience this life. A mission, marriage, children, grandchildren. I wanted him to be in our home with children who reminded me of him, laughing, singing, talking with his siblings about life, his work, the gospel.

I wonder if he will ever have the opportunity to experience this life the way the rest of us do. With all of it's joys and sorrows. Will he date and fall in love. Will it be the same experience for him. What about college and the fun of living in a dorm and feeling that kind of independence. What about marriage...the anticipation of the wedding day, all the pictures and parties. What about the birth of a child and knowing and planning for their life. Coaching their little league games, getting baby sitters and going to a movie and dinner. Enjoying all the wonderful things of this place we call earth.


Will it be the same for him? For Taylor Ammon? Will it be the same for us as their parents? For those who are here such a short time, is it a blessing or a loss.

We are told that everything in this life first existed spiritually-everything but the body and all of the things that we can only experience with the addition of that body. It must be quite special because we were willing to leave a most perfect existence to obtain it. An existence less perfect without it.

So I hope that his experience will be the same but without any of the pain and sorrow. Just a short time here to receive his body, then on to an easier way of maturing. What more could a mother pray for than that? Only the good experiences of this life for their children. Perhaps that blessing alone would be worth the pain of the separation.